Week 43: 300 days down 65 to go and now this

300 days have passed since I paid my $600 to sign up for IMFL.  300 days.  A lot can happen in 300 days.  There were a lot of things I expected might happen in 300 days.  I didn't know the tendonitis would happen but it was probable given the strain I was putting on my legs from running.  Once I solved that issue, I never truly believed that I'd really run fast again until a few weeks ago at RBR and then this week I surpassed my longest distance and confidently and comfortably ran 16 miles.  The first 14 were at my typical snail's pace of 10:30-11 min miles.  But my coach asked me to amp it up a little at the end and I laid down two 8:45 miles and was as excited as a triathlete figuring out how to wirelessly download their Garmin to Training Peaks.  Ok, call me a nerd, it makes me very excited every time I hear that beep.

I thought I might lose my job because of the economy.  That hasn't happened but things are looking quite shaky.  I thought I would learn a lot about myself over 12 months of training for an Ironman because that‘s what everyone says will happen.  I have.  But I didn't learn what I thought I would learn.  What I have learned over the past 10 months was how to be a better friend.  How to listen to people.  How to care more about other people. And how to let them care about me. It has been a very unexpected result.  And one that makes me wonder how much of life I have missed out on by not seeing this.

And I guess I learned this lesson just in time.  Because something else has happened that I never dreamt possible while training for an Ironman.  I got cancer.  And I hope you can see I am not writing this because I want pity or attention.  I am writing it because it’s just something that happens to so many people going along their path in life.  And you sit on a table in a doc’s office and they have to tell you this.  That you have abnormal cells growing in you.  And you have to figure out how to handle it.  Without losing it in front of the doc while he explains the procedure and the scars and the permanent numbness of your neck and ear and the chance your trapezoid may not work on that side and your swim will really suck.  Worse than it does now.  And you may be hoarse forever.  The cancer in my thyroid doesn’t concern them as much as the cancer in my lymph nodes.  This is not hyper or hypothyroidism which would have shown up on tests.  My blood work is completely normal.  Had it not been for the pain I experienced in my neck while pushing  my head forward while riding aero, I might not have discovered this.  At this point it’s an 85% success rate.  I think those are really good odds.

I mostly held it all together in his office and then fell apart for 5 minutes in the ladies room.  5 minutes.  That’s really all I needed.  Went to the hospital admin office and took care of the paperwork so I can go back Tuesday for the surgery which lasts about 4-5 hours and requires one night at the hospital.  It is a 2-3 week recovery period at home.  There is no chemo but I have to wear some pretty scary looking drains and there is a radioactive iodine pill I will take afterwards to kill off any remaining cells.  (You might not want to visit me those days.)  It is just another hiccup on the road to Ironman Florida.  It is most likely a cancer I have been living with for awhile.  It did not happen overnight.

But back to the new found skill I have learned over the past 10 months.  The one where I let other people help me and care about me.  Something tells me it is going to come in handy during the month of September and beyond.  Perhaps you can teach an old dog new tricks.  I’m about to find out.

Thank you all for the love and concern you have sent me.  I have always wanted to experience what it felt like to be on a team.  And it feels really really good.